Halftime

Today was Brendan's last day of chemotherapy.
[deep breath]
On Tuesday he will fly across the pond to spend some time with Heather, and have himself a small vacation before entering round 2 of Operation Defeat Cancer - radiation.

I'm assuming another PET scan will be coming in the next few days as well.
I'm sure you all know by now how anxious I've been to see the results.

These weights.
It's hard to sleep with them pressing on my chest.
I'm nervous - just as I was when he was about to start treatment. That helpless, uneasy, unsure sort of anxious. I am not quite sure what reasonable expectations are - I only know what I hope to hear.
I want it gone. I hope it's gone. I know I shouldn't expect it to be gone - that it won't be gone.
I just want it gone.